Beautifully ruined

A random comment from some random person can still make me think for hours and make me loose my sleep, dive deep into myself, just to examine my till-date life and judge myself to analyse if I have done something wrong to rightfully 'deserve' those comments. The comments they made are now in the past but I am still trying to pull my soul with me in the present, which apparently seems to be lost in the streets of those loud commentators. My head was bruised from thinking so far. My eyes finally opened the gates for the rivers of my soul, they call it tears these days. I went to sleep with music in my soul, drenched in the melody of every word they spoke. 

And now, every time when I am out, I can feel those eyes rolling over me, trying to judge my so-called character just for their future gossips. I know I did nothing wrong but I am still guilty, guilty in the eyes of those who doesn't even matter to me. I am still trying to convert myself from my earlier Okay to the new, unknown definition of Okay, just to satisfy some unknown people. Life was better when everything looked perfect, when I looked perfect. 

Perfect? Again, who is perfect enough anyways!

The people, they don't even matter to me. I am not going to destroy my sleep and my thoughts over some random people. Because you, you aren't the one who is going to stay with me forever, its me. You can't take me down by backstroking me. Its either because you are scared enough to comment in my face or may be its your character, worst enough to pull dirt on others without thinking about your own self. So let me burn the heap of your slutty comments and take a breath in that flame. I'll take out my shiny armour and place my crown right above my head. I am not drowning in my mistakes but I am flying with my experience. I'll be my own star, shining bright in the dark.